Heartless Lovers
by TreesAndCheese
Summary: Ivan's heart fell out during dinner and he learned something new about his little Matvey.


**Heartless Lovers.**

Matthew had simply smiled and told him not to even worry about it. He stood, walked to the sink, and got a cloth to mop the blood on the table with. He then sent Kuma to get an old bath towel wet for the blood on the floor.

There was no panicking. No disgust. No silly worrying. Not even the smallest hint of surprise after the initial shock had worn out.

He had then pointedly looked at Ivan and said, "Go wash that off. Unless, of course, you like having soup on your vital organs."

Ivan had then finally looked down to his wayward heart. The pesky organ had fallen out right in the middle of a very nice dinner between himself and Matthew and landed right in his bowl of soup.

His heart tended to fall out when it just got too heavy; when he was sad or lonely. This time it had nothing to even do with that. It had fallen out simply because he was thinking of days gone by. Of when he used to be so lonely it felt like there was no one left alive in the world, not even himself. Thinking of the days before he had Matthew.

Almost in a daze, he picked up his heart and brought it to the sink to rise it. He had always secretly liked holding his heart in his hands. It was soft and surprisingly warm. It moved ever so slightly in his lose hold. It felt like he was holding the personification of life in his hands. Without his heart, he would not be so alive or happy. So, in a way he was holding his life in his hands.

Every so gently, he washed it. It made him calm to take care of himself, and of others too. By the time he turned around again, the mess was almost gone. Matthew and Kumajirou were hard at work finishing it off.

"Ah... Matvey... I apologize... I did not-" Ivan started uncertainly.

"Don't even worry about it! I figured it would happen sometime." Matthew's smile had always been so beautiful. Bright and trustworthy.

"You did?" He asked blankly, still holding his heart in his hands.

"Yes."

"How?"

"It happened at that one meeting, remember?" He had finally finished cleaning and straightened up to look at him.

"Well, da but..." Ivan trailed off slightly, nose scrunching cutely as he thought.

"I was there, Ivan. I saw it happen." Matthew sighed quietly.

"Ah." And it was left at that.

He lovingly placed his heart back in his chest . They finished cleaning off the table and went to sit in the other room.

They had TV to watch and snuggling to do. So, no harm done and their life went back to it's normal bliss.

~ TreesAndCheese ~

The night was quiet as always. Ivan had gone to bed several hours ago. Matthew had sat up in bed and listened for the small noises from the other room to stop. Eventually, he deemed it safe enough for him to slip out of bed and turn on his light.

There was something he had to check.

He knelt on the floor and gently slid an ornate chest out from under his bed. It wasn't very big; it easily fit on his lap. But it did hold something so valuable and important that, for a moment, he simply ran his hands daintily along the top of it. There was a small, sad sounding sigh at the amount of dust that had settled on the top.

_How long had it been?_

So many years. Too many years. But he wished he could put it off for just a little longer. He sighed again, even though he didn't really feel too sad. In fact, he felt nothing. To him, that was a good thing. That meant he could continue his charade of caring. The false smiles. The phony laughs. Pretending that he felt happiness, sadness, irritation. It was all just a ploy. It had been for so many years. Now he only felt distant feelings, usually strongest (but still so weak) when he was with Ivan. He wasn't entirely sure what it was that he felt. It was too... wispy... to grasp fully. But it had been enough for him to have a remote interest in "pursuing a relationship" with him.

Hesitatingly, he brought his fingers up to the delicate chain around his neck. He slowly brought it off from around his neck. He gathered his courage and pulled a small key off the chain.

It was rather small, but very intricate. It was gold and sparkled in the dim light as he shakingly brought it to the lock on the chest. There was a soft click and the lock swung open.

He slowly lifted the lid of the box and grasped the object inside. He gasped at the sudden rush of emotions. He shuddered at the feelings of despair and loneliness that he had kept locked up for so long. Waves and waves of emotion washed over him as he sat there, sobbing on the floor clutching the object to his chest.

His heart.

He had locked it away for so long that the emotions that came with it felt amazingly intense. He screamed with fear when he felt a hand on his shoulder. Normally he would have barely blinked. He blinked the tears out of his eyes to see the form of Ivan squatting in front of him. That strange feeling he got when he saw Ivan intensified immensely. It overwhelmed him.

But he couldn't _identify it!_ What was it? It hurt so much. He felt a tight squeezing in his chest, where his heart should be. He was so shocked he immediately dropped his heart on the floor, causing him to shriek in pain. Ivan, acting quickly, pulled off his gloves and carefully scooped up Matthew's heart. Immediately, the screaming stopped, only to be replaced by sad little whimpers.

Ivan regarded him for a moment. He was currently holding himself tightly and crying softly into his knees. He moved the heart to one hand and scooted closer to embrace him gently in his arms.

"Why? Why don't they ever remember me?"He wailed clutching his shirt and scarf as if they were the only things that could keep him from drowning in despair. Ivan could only hold him close and fight off tears himself.

He just let him cry until his tears subsided into little hiccups and gasps. The Ivan picked him up bridal style and carried him and his heart to the bathroom.

"We need to get you cleaned up, da?" He placed Matthew on the counter and filled one of the sinks with slightly warm water. As he did this, he took the time to actually look at the heart he was holding.

It was smaller then his own, obviously. Matthew was smaller so it makes sense for his heart to be smaller. But it was also a dark grayish-blue. No where near the healthy shade of pink it should be. It was also not moving at all. Usually (even after it leaves his body) it would move around and pump blood. There was not a drop of blood left in this heart.

He carefully slid the cold heart into the warm water and stopped the tap. He turned to the crying man on the counter.

"Matvey," He turned to address him. "This isn't healthy. You can't just take out your heart and leave it somewhere."

"I know," he sniffled. "It just hurt so much when they forgot me. I thought, it might be better if I just didn't feel anything." He turned away. "You wouldn't understand. No one does."

He tilted Matthew's chin up and towards him with the tip of his finger. "Of course I know how you feel, perhaps more then that. People hate me, but this isn't the way to deal with it. I promise, there are other feelings, better ones. There's happiness, joy, elation, peace... love... and so many more. If you just let yourself feel them, you'd see. Please Matthew. Try. Do it for me. Do it for yourself."

Matthew looked down, frowning. Suddenly, a thought popped in Ivan's head. If Matthew didn't have his heart, then he didn't really feel anything. So... he didn't really love him, did he? If he felt nothing then...

He looked at Matthew. He looked at the gorgeous man that he had fallen in love with. The one who had taken over his heart with his little smiles and laughs. Now the lack of fear when he first met him made a lot more sense. This man... he would give up anything, do _anything_ for him. Now that he had his emotions back, what if he didn't want to be with him anymore. what if he found out that he had _hated him. _

Doing his best to hold down his misery, he trailed his finger across his neck to lightly grip at the hair behind hid head. He slowly moved closer so he was mere inches from the other man. He paused as Matthew moved back in trepidation. He waited with bated breath until Matthew settled once again in his hold.

"Love. It makes everything worth it, and nothing matter. I had been without happiness for so long before you. I just wish, you hadn't lied and said you loved me too." He murmured against his lips. He sighed. "May I kiss you? Just one last time?"

Matthew tilted his head slightly. He hadn't been asked for a kiss since the first year if their relationship. "Yes." he whispered.

There was a second of a pause before he lovingly placed his lips on his. Ivan melted against his lips. They moved against each other with familiarity. It took a while for Matthew to reciprocate but after a a minute their sweet kiss turned into something more... desperate Matthew reached up and grabbed his hair to pull him closer. The kissed turned from familiar to being full of brand new passion. The two broke away, gasping for air.

"I want something." He said, sounding dazed. "I haven't wanted anything in decades."

"What is it you want, Sunflower?" Ivan asked gently. Matthew didn't answer for a moment, choosing instead to look up into his deep purple eyes.

"I also found out what that feeling was, the one I felt around you, even without my heart."

Russia tilted his head towards him in interest.

"I figured out that what I feel... is love. And what I want is to kiss you." Matthew grinned and pulled Ivan close. As they slipped into their kiss, they ignored the splashes in the sink that signaled Matthew's heart had restarted.

**Hey~!**

**Umm... yes, i just wrote that. **

**Cause, you know how Russia's heart falls out sometimes? I thought it would be neat if Canda's did that too. **

**Thoughts? Please leave a review.**

**Also Feel free to read an review my story "Inspire" Where i am taking one word prompts. The next chapter of that will be up soon~ish. **

**I have also started the next "Doll's Curse" Chapter.**

**Please leave a review!**

**Tons-o-luv**

**TreesAndCheese**


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